A Bay Area Therapist’s Top Sex & Sexuality Book Recommendations

Therapy is a big investment of time, energy, and financial resources. And while I whole heartedly believe that therapy can be a profoundly healing experience that equips people with tools to live healthier, more fulfilling lives, it really is what you put into it. Merely attending a 50 minute session each week isn’t going to magically change your life. The winning combination is a willingness to show up and do the work in session, and implement those changes throughout your week.

One of my favorite recommendations for my counseling clients is to supplement our work with some intentional reading. By adding some adjunctive therapeutic reading (psychobabble term: bibliotherapy) on certain topics you want to change, then working to make those incremental changes can really help your healing process.

My clients often laugh when I say (regularly) “Okay I have a book I want you to check out”. I make lots of book recommendations, and often. Seriously, this blog was originally 4 pages! I had to break it up by topic. So here are my most recommended therapy books about sex and sexuality:

Top Recommended Books on Sex & Sexuality:

Come as You Are: Revised and Updated: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life by Emily Nagoski 

An informative, fun to read book about understanding female sexuality. It includes lots of research without feeling dry, and includes many practical ways to improve your sex life. Highly recommend for all women, and the partners that want to be better sex partners!

Girls & Sex: Navigating the Complicated New Landscape by Peggy Orenstein

Reading this book turned me into that person that soapbox about sex, how we are shaping (and failing) our young people and entire society by the way we talk about sex. A helpful account of how young girls and women are being formed and engaging in sex, with some ideas from other cultures about how we can move from a risk and danger approach of sex towards a joy and responsibility framework around sex.

Boys & Sex: Young Men on Hookups, Love, Porn, Consent, and Navigating the New Masculinity by Peggy Orenstein

A great companion book to Girls and Sex, this time focusing on how boys and young men in America are learning about and engaging in sex. It includes a helpful section on how many boys can define what sexual assault entails, but fail to connect the dots to their own actions, plus a great section on reparative justice. 

Cliff & Joyce Penner Resource Library

For those looking for books on sex from a faith-based perspective, I recommend the Penner’s library of books. They have many resources ranging from understanding sexuality in a Christian context, strategies for common sexual issues, and ways to strengthen your sex life.

Pure: Inside the Evangelical Movement That Shamed a Generation of Young Women and How I Broke Free by Linda Kay Klein

This is a great account of both memoir and qualitative study of how the purity culture movement within the evangelical context has impacted a generation of men and women around their sense of shame and sexuality. For anyone deconstructing faith after an evangelical upbringing, this book may resonate.

If you want to know more about working together and starting therapy, reach out today to schedule a free 15 minute consultation call for therapy in Dublin, CA today.

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